I’ve been thinking very recently about the idea of leaving social media through the avenues of Facebook and my blog. Recently I find myself frequently confused by the many voices and suggestions and words that I put myself in contact with on a daily basis.
It seems like these days we’ve all built social media routines into our normal lives so seamlessly that it’s so unorthodox to attempt to remove oneself from any social media platform. I’ll always use the excuse, ‘but I won’t have access to this or know that or be able to see this or let this person know this’ and it complicates being able to make decisions in regards to social media because we either feel like we owe people certain information/explanation about our lives, or we expect certain information/explanation from other people. It’s a very weird, but seen as normal, dynamic.
I am finding that if I allow too many voices into my life that I feel flustered, I’m not sure yet if that is a youthful inability to compartmentalize or if it is just a personality quirk of mine. Whatever the reason though, social media is consistently the culprit of stress and over-thinking in my life and I am looking to put an end to that.
I don’t know what that should mean yet, whether it’s to keep up Facebook and my blog and just not utilize them or if it’s to shut them down for a time, or if it’s to remove myself completely from those outlets.
It seems like such a drastic choice to think I might decide to have a life apart social media, I almost feel guilty for depriving people the right to view my life whenever they want, I think that could be a problem, haha :D
For a long time I’ve examined the success of my home, work, and life by reviewing my past and other’s present, through Facebook and blogs. I am actually in a very good place right now in regards to that poor habit, I am aware of a lot and have gained rest in a lot of areas, and I think it’s good, but, thanks to social media, I am also still also very aware of a lot in other people’s lives too, and I am realizing that I don’t know if can be that invested. Because the thing is, I seem to find myself invested in people’s lives, due to social media, without even meaning to! Maybe I shouldn’t say invested, because it’s not really invested in a real way, it’s more like invested in an observing way, aka, a pretty lame way to say you are involved in other human beings lives.
I always think I’ll regret giving up connections of Facebook and my blog, that I’ll look back and think why didn’t I just keep posting so I wouldn’t have empty pockets of time when I wasn’t recording what was happening in my life or staying connected with so many other people’s lives, why would I just give it up for a stage, shouldn’t I just decide one way or another and stick with it?
But you see,
I want to remember my life, but I don’t want to have been so overly concerned about remembering and compiling blog posts of my life when I was meant to be living my life.
I want to stay connected with people, but I don’t want to live life thinking that seeing that someone had a baby is as invested as congratulating someone on having a baby.
I want to feel inspired, but I don’t want to feel like my life or home is in need of a makeover because I am bombarded with possible DIY projects to tackle.
I want to share news with friends and family, but I don’t want to feel like I am meant to share in a certain way or put the standard on myself that it isn’t official until its Facebook official (it sounds lame, but I know I’m not the only one out there that can feel that way!)
I think that many, many people have found the unique healthy balance in their interaction with social media, I am concerned though that I have not.
These are just some thoughts I’ve been pondering, some habits I’ve been mulling over in an attempt to understand better why I’ve put them in place, whether consciously or unconsciously. I’ve interacted with some very good habits recently, ones that have made me consider the validity and worth of some of my other habits.
One habit that I am seeking to put into place more is one of actually experiencing rest in Christ. If a Christian, we are allowed the peace and rest of Christ at any/every moment of any/every day. It’s almost a Sunday school answer it’s said and heard so much in the Christian community, but what isn’t talked about as much is the sneaky ability and habit of being able to refuse to live into that peace and rest, sometimes without even realizing it. When I am stressed or anxious my initial reaction is to try to do something to feel peaceful again, to read the bible or pray or just ask for help, to ask, ‘what do I do?’ When really, what we are meant to do is to quiet ourselves, GIVE our worries to God and acknowledge the peace He offers. It’s not an emotional show or to-do list, it’s a quiet release. I am just recently learning the difference between the two and realizing more how less emotions can leave room for the right feelings, it seems like such a funny statement, but it makes so much sense when you find yourself without the anxious emotions but full of a peaceful, understanding calm.
Giving God space in our minds and hearts to reveal His peace in our lives is something that wins over any contrived emotional experience every time.
The other night Justin and I went over to my older brother David and his wife Judy’s home for a bit, well it ended up being 5 hours, haha, :D , but amidst the ebb and flow of conversation this topic of social media in our lives today came up and resulted in some excellent conversation, swapping of perspectives, and stating of wisdom. I want to be able to remember each little part of the conversation because it was so good, but I think that is just the blogger inside of me feeling like I owe my blog the most complete and thorough explanation of my life, that I NEED to have the conversation recorded, when really it’s okay to be able to say that we had a great conversation and then leave it at that!
Along with the habit of realizing peace in my life, I’ve been considering the longevity of habits. My blog is a little over 2 ½ years old and it has recorded SO much of my life already, but I think about my life 10, 15, 20 years from now and I can honestly say I don’t think I want to be blogging then. I don’t think I want to be concerned with an internet space throughout all of those years or be dependent on a digital space to recall my life, perhaps I don’t give my own memory enough credit, perhaps I think that I will want a detailed account of my past more then I actually will, perhaps I cut short the other ways to remember, perhaps I don’t realize that quality is better than quantity, even in memories.
I have a BOAT load of other thoughts on this topic and the process of my interaction with it, but I think to suffice, since this post is already almost a blog in and of itself :D , I will just say I have been considering leaving this space and Facebook to attempt to allow myself the time to build habits of hearing God’s voice in my life above all of the other voices that I seem to constantly invite into my life under the heading of ‘normal’.